Love it or hate it… V-Day is here. A day commercialized around pinks, reds, hearts and chocolate, with high hopes of expressing love. It’s the relationship status that passionately influences opinions about Valentine’s Day, but there is no denying, that February 14 comes tagged with high expectations.
There is plenty of pressure to be romantic and passionate, bubbly and light-hearted, even willing to set aside differences for the all famous cupid day. After all, it is the day, every relationship is put on a pedestal for measurement and close inspection.
What really sparks the magic of Valentine’s Day varies big from one couple to another. There is no “made to order” perfection in creating a perfect V-day, no matter how much time you invest. What I have found to be true in my happiest Valentine’s celebrations were not at all about the sparkle, glamour or the candy. The extra fluff is exciting and fun, but very temporal and short-lived. Superficial.
My husband and I have been married for a long time, practically my whole life, since high school, try 37 years of Valentine days. We have shared many great Valentine’s Days – this story will be a best seller one day :)). I will leave it at that for now, to give you some time to anticipate my book. It will be the one in the store window that says “the everlasting love story” with no dirty words. If you know me, you know I hate ugly language. I see it as a lack of skills to express yourself, laziness to find the right container to cradle your thoughts. My friend calls me a “Wordsmith”- a lover of words. I say, she knows me well. Words are everything, yet simply nothing, without action.
So what are the 5 best V-day gifts? This is my list:
1. Acceptance and respect for each other as an individual, as a partner, and in all things touching our lives.
2. Trust and forgiveness, it’s a rock foundation that must exist. We all need Grace & Mercy.
3. Recognition and support of knowing whats important to each other, making what to buy for each other as gifts easy, because you really know each other, you’re engaged in each others life.
4. Writing long cards and notes that are meaningful, not just words. Sharing sentiments that are real, raw and exposed. Just sitting down and listening to each other, really listening and not criticizing. Keeping your heart out there, open to keep filling up with more.
5. Keeping holidays, birthdays, important events highlighted with sentiments of celebration. Making dinner reservations every week and sharing turns at favorite spots. Making it all about the other person’s contentment.
A few things I learned a long time ago, no one can buy you happiness or support your happiness, no matter how magnificent, they are as a person. Set the backdrop for what makes you happy and notice what excites others. Identify in your mind what keeps you content.
I keep fresh flowers in my house all the time because flowers are special to me, so there is no pressure for V-Day flowers, My husband walks around and gathers fresh flowers from the roadside when we;re spending time in our mountain cabin, that’s 20 minutes from town. I like that, it makes me happy. So on Valentine’s day, a single bouquet of flowers would not make me excited, but a bouquet in several rooms could work.
You see the picture, I believe it’s the consistent gestures and engagement process that enables us to really know others, that keeps everyday special, not just Valentine’s day. Being a wife or a participate in a relationship is not just a label, it’s a responsibility to be involved in the details of that relationship from day-to-day.
I hope my list helped with your quest for the perfect and best gift. What are your Valentine plans?
Happy Valentine’s Day,
The very word “Christmas” brings joy. That is why everyone says, Merry Christmas! Christmas brings forth a spirit of peace, the gladness of hope and the warmth of love to the world.
Some “Christmas Cheer” to pocket as you run here, there and everywhere over the next couple of busy weeks. I call it a pocket full of sunshine.
- “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year”. Charles Dickens
- “Christmas is the day that holds all time together”. Alexander Smith
- “This is the message of Christmas: We are never alone”. Taylor Caldwell
- “As long as we know in our hearts what Christmas ought to be, Christmas is”. Eric Sevareid
- “The world has grown old with its burden of care, but at Christmas time, its alway young”. Phillip Brooks
- “Christmas is a day of meaning and traditions, a special day spent in the warm circle of friends and family”. Margaret Thatcher
- “Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect. To all, charity.” Oren Arnold
- “Christmas in Bethlehem. The ancient dream: a cold, clear night made brilliant by a glorious star, the smell of incense, shepherds and wise men falling to their knees in adoration of the sweet baby, the incarnation of perfect love”. Lucinda Franks
- “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince Of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end”. Isaiah 9:6
One of my personal favorites –Thomas Kincaid:
- “The flow of blessings in our life is directly related to our passing blessings along to others”.
Christmas is a celebration, make it count! It’s counting down now, hurry.
Looking for some ways to spread the cheer?
- Write a letter to a soldier away from home and share your gratitude.
- Go Christmas caroling with a group.
- Seek out a forgotten friend and renew the friendship.
- Make a decision to “let something go”.
- Encourage someone with kind words.
- Take joy and pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth around you.
- Be kind: Be gentle.
- Share something you treasure and ask your friends to join you, make it a party.
- Have a 5 course meal shared by 5 different friends at their homes. Start with friend at the salad house, then to the soup house, then over the main course and finally the desert host and closing the night with the coffee-house.
What are you doing to spread Christmas Cheer? And remember, Jesus is the reason for the Christmas Season, – God’s gift to mankind.